I have been scratching and clawing back into the tri-ing mode for four weeks now, ever since my race. To say I’m not struggling would be a lie.
I have been talking with a new SBM friend (who I’ll call Kate) who is struggling to keep moving. She just started running last week after spending several years in *Mom Land. She wants to do a race, but can’t envision getting past 5 miles when 1 mile is so painful.
[*Mom Land is the place where snacks, fat and sluggishness abound….the place where, if you aren’t careful, you’ll get sucked into the void of Dora the Explorer, Cheetos and you may never find yourself again. I lived in Mom Land for only three short years, luckily. Before that I lived in Party Land. The place where you can work all day, drink beer all night and sleep until 2 on the weekends. While Party Land is significantly more “fun” than Mom Land, both can have the same nasty endgame.]
(Okay, this is supposed to be funny. No Mommy Dearest comments, please.)
When I get emails like Kate’s, I want to scream because I feel her emotions so deeply. I understand beyond all doubt the pain, silence and struggle of working, having kids, and being out of shape. And not knowing what in the world to do about any of it. Where one step forward is often met with two steps back, a slap and some outside tragedy.
On this rainy Georgia Monday, I am hoping to share one thing with you. At the same time, I am hoping to motivate myself back into the routine, the determination and drive to keep moving through my journey. Many of you know that my favorite quote in the world is from Ayn Rand:
“The question isn’t who is going to let me;
it’s who is going to stop me.”
This attitude is deliciously obnoxious.
People who are content to sit, to watch their life roll on past don’t understand this kind of attitude. These individuals will start to resent you for your new outlook on life. The resentment will start small and harmless, like in the breakroom at work, “OMG, how can you get up at 4:30am to go to the gym?”
Then the more determined you become, the more you’ll feel and see the resentment, the eye-rolling, the snickers (and not the yummy candy bar kind of snickers).
Even people who are close to you, people who love you.
Go ahead. Say you’re going to accomplish something big. Say it out loud, blog about it, scream it from the rooftops, and watch the negativity and resentment unfold right before your eyes. I watched it happen from the time I finished St. Anthony’s Olympic distance triathlon, until the day I crossed the finish line at Miami 70.3.
Recently, I told someone close to me that I started writing a book. And they laughed at me. It wasn’t a big laugh, but it was a snicker…like, oh, here she goes again with her big stupid plans. This kind of negativity is just plain infuriating.
Outside negativity does one of two things to a person seeking to accomplish a new, scary goal:
1) The negativity either thrusts you into “I’ll show you” mode, or
2) The negativity knocks you down completely, deflating your confidence and ending the goal.
On this rainy day, my prayer for you:
Whatever your goal, show those negative people who you are.
Better yet, prove yourself to yourself.
Let the only person who can stop you… be you.
Importantly, you must then tell yourself:
Yes. I. Can. And. I. Will.
Keep moving forward, my friends.