Expert: Will you be mad at me if I go to space?
Expert: Space. Seriously. I feel like I need to go to space.
Me: (Ignoring him)
Expert: Are you listening? I am so going to space. I will go to space.
Me: Why don’t you clean up your kitchen space?
Expert: What does it cost to go to space?
Me: …..More than we have.
Expert: ….More than you have. I am going to space.
Me: Oh. So you have a separate bank account.
Whatever. Is the account full of cookies?
Expert: Oh, I am so in space.
Me: Super. Ask the monkeys if they’ll keep you.
Expert: You are just jealous.
Me: No. The monkeys can have you. Dear Monkeys, take this Jackass to Space.