So I received this email yesterday.

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And my heart has been pounding ever since.  Seriously.  I think about the race. Boom Boom Boom. Then I get clammy.

Bye bye, Beast.  The Beast is clammy. 

Then all day I have felt like I’m going to pants my poop… so I run to the bathroom at work, only to find someone talking on their phone in the stall, so I kind of dance around and go to the next floor, but then by the time I get there—-I have forgotten about Ironman, and I don’t have to pants my poop.

So I go back to my desk, and then I remember… oh man. Boom boom boom.

Pants my poop…. pants my poop… and the cycle starts again.

Which is probably why I am actually losing weight. Because I am now running a fat-burning, mid-Zone 2 heartrate ALL DAY LONG.

Then I remember Coach Monster’s wisdom from before Miami

You are not dying.  This is not a big deal – it’s not cancer, it’s not homelessness, it’s not job loss.  It’s triathlon, for God’s sake. Enjoy your journey. Stop trying to be what you’re not.  Listen to your body.  Be who you are, right in this second.  Be that person.  Be grateful.  And give yourself a break.”

And he was right.

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Breathe. Breathe. Don’t poop.  T-minus 3 hours to ortho appointment.  Breathe breathe. 

Be a beast. Be a beast.

15 Responses

  1. THANK YOU FOR THIS! I needed to know I am not crazy when I have the same thoughts (And I am just doing my first sprint… I can’t even wrap my head around an Ironman!)- but I legit spend my day going between “you’re so bad ass” to “what are you thinking?!” You go girl!

  2. On a much smaller level, I will be finishing my first sprint in 4 weeks.
    I too at times I am going to pants my poop…. I can’t believe how far I have come this year…. Good luck today at the Ortho. We look forward to hearing the results. Stay tough chica.

  3. I really needed to hear this. I am just doing a mini sprint next weekend and I am starting to freak myself out over it. @ Kathleen, thanks for your post too,I needed to hear that as well. Glad I am not the only one!! @ Swim.Bike.Mom your posts are always inspirational and down right funny!!

  4. Those emails from the race freak me out too. So far mine have all really been about travel and extra excursions so I’ve been lulled into a false sense of security. But they still make my heart pound.

  5. I just found Swim Bike Mom 4-5 days ago and you are now my biggest time waster and I mean that in the best possible way!! I’m devouring your website! I’m also running my first sprint tri in a month because honestly isn’t the age of 37 and no prior experience in any of the 3 events, 3 kids under the age of 8 and about to make a cross-country move the PERFECT time to do your first tri?! At first I thought I’d drown. I’ve now trained enough that I won’t drown. Yay! Now, I can’t go to sleep at night because I’m worried about transitions and I still have to learn to change a flat on my bike and OMG what if I can’t get my feet out of my clips….so all that to say I LOVE your site! Thanks for your Coach’s words of wisdom – I bet a bunch of us needed to hear that today.

  6. Love it! This post cracked me up and made me feel grounded all at the same time. So great – his words are a great reminder!

  7. My friend turned me on to your blog and I just cried I thought I was insane to dream of doing an Ironman now I believe it is possible.
    I did print your coaches words to read every morning!
    thnk you for sharing

  8. I did Coeur d’Alene and Canada – The best I have to offer is: trust in your training because once you are lined up and ready to roll, there is a peace in knowing you can’t do anymore training, either you put the time in or you didn’t (so forget the missed swim/bike/run), but that you will finish the DAY…yes, tell yourself that you are just having a long training session and that you have ALL day!!!! Also, what helps me is NOT to be focused on the sum total of the day (ie: 140.6 miles), but to take one piece and focus on that piece, then move on!!!! Much can happen during the day (LOTS that you can’t plan for), just go out and ENJOY the experience….I spent almost the entire bike of IM Canada (my first) freaking out to everyone I knew “OMG, I am ACTUALLY doing an Ironman!!!!!” and princess waving the whole way 🙂 I finished in 14:57…well before the cutoff and I had a miserable run…You CAN do this and it will be AMAZING!!!!!

  9. I LOVE the advice Coach Monster gave you that you put in this blog post. I really needed to hear that tonight. Thanks for posting SBM!

  10. Meredith, I bought your book from Amazon last week and I am seriously loving it. I am just starting to train for my first sprint triathlon at the end of July and your book has been so helpful and encouraging (not to mention funny). I can’t wait to finish reading it and I’m looking forward to following your journey to your Ironman on your blog. You are so inspiring!

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