Down 2.8 pounds.  We won’t talk about how much I was up from the holiday week.  Or the week before that.  My post-Augusta, pre-Holiday season rut.  But I think the gloomy rut is over. Really, I do.

Okay, so fine. Complete transparency.  Up ten pounds. Yes, in like 3 weeks. I’m awesome like that.  Putting on weight like a Sumo.

So today’s weigh-in was 213. Which is shamefully, 10 pounds more than the joyful weigh-in of 203…just a mere few weeks ago. So close to the 100’s.  Yet, back so far away. But that’s how I roll.  I shake it like a Polariod picture.  I roll like a Roller Coaster.  I move through the lap lanes in the pool like a humpback whale (huge or not, I PR’d in the pool today for a time trial, so that’s something.)  I can put on weight like it’s my job.

This was me last week.

…Now, it’s not like I don’t know what caused that weight gain.  I can’t say, “I just can’t lose weight! Waaaaaah.”  Well, of course I can.  I proved that I could lose 12 pounds in a matter of two weeks when I ate clean, avoided booze and worked my butt puddinoff at the gym.

But my weight. Food. Comfort of a nice glass (or three) of red wine. It’s my “thing” – some people scrapbook and watch television or play video games. I stand in front of my pantry and shovel.

It’s hard to get control over something that is your very trigger for self-destruction.

So I am back in control again, day two.  And it’s funny.  Really all it takes is a positive streak of 2-3 days, and I’m back on the wagon, making smoothies like Planet Smoothie.  Day 2 and I’m in control. Yesss…

And really, I have to thank my dear Expert.  He made a promise to me on Sunday night—that he was going to hold me accountable, to keep me focused to Coeur d’Alene.  All of the dwindling seven months of the countdown that remain. I don’t have a ton of time here, people.   I can do this race, I know I can.  But at 173, not 213.

And last night… I wanted to break down the walls of Dairy Queen for a Blizzard and the gas station for beer…. he held me back, and we made smoothies.  (Casein smoothies —-ick!  Does anyone have a good casein powder? Mine tasted like foam.)

So with the gloom, comes the sun.  Right now, I’m sunshining.  I’m focused.

Goal is to ring in the New Year weighing 199.9.  You know… to party like it’s 1999.   Only seems appropriate.

7 Responses

  1. I’m on day 3 of the metabolic boost and am doing great. Like you, I love red wine but have accepted the fact that will have to wait for Saturday. Ice cream is my downfall but I have a solution. Have you seen Yonanas? It’s a crazy good machine that mushes up bananas and whatever fruit you throw in the chute. The consistency is like ice cream. So yeah. That’s my last meal every day of the boost.

  2. You can do this! It really does get easier to make better choices – I can’t believe I’ve made it to week 6!

  3. I admire you doing this metabolic boost but I can not do it. With 2 other athletes to feed who are at their idea weight, I have to fine tune what I make for them and lose it slower. I have lost 15 lbs since mid Sept and have 15 to go by the end of April, about 1ish lbs a week so far and it is slow. Good news is I am learning to like new foods and learning new skills to cope with stress and my root cause of my over eating. Best of luck on round 2 and the upcoming Christmas holiday challenges, I know you will be successful.

  4. I’ve been using CytoSport’s “Complete Casein” Vanilla Creme and think its delicious. I use the powder, water, a cut up frozen banana and some PB2 to make a yummy milkshake-ish smoothie. Try it! It’s my favorite meal of the day 🙂

  5. My shift in thinking about food happened when I started chasing performance and not worrying about scale. I set small goals for myself-run the next 5K in X time or swim Xmeters in a certain time. I set regular benchmarks for myself so I could really gauge progress. And you know what? The weight started coming off AND my conditioning improved. Food became FUEL for my body and not just a comfort. Yes, it’s still a comfort and I still “cheat” occasionally but that shift in thinking really helped me stay on task to make good choices. Do I have a beer sometimes, yes, but before I eat or drink anything, I always think “how is this going to affect my performance tomorrow?” A small piece of dark chocolate as a treat (yes!), a giant bowl of ice cream (no!) because I will feel sluggish and tired the next day. I have also completely cut grains out of my diet (not sure how it works with the eating plan you are doing) but I feel so much better and my tummy has gotten so much flatter. I found if I keep my blood sugar more even (and avoid high glycemic foods-grains and sugar) my body works so much better. Maybe not for everyone but it works for me. I just don’t buy the food I am avoiding anymore. If it’s not in the house, I can’t eat it. Keep your eye on the prize-you can do it!!!!

  6. As always, thanks for being open and honest. The quote “It’s hard to get control over something that is your very trigger for self-destruction” just resonated with me. I’ve got the metabolic boost, but I’m scared to start it.

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