I have hesitated to do this for a long time…
This? 
What’s “this”? 
This… 
is telling my weight to the entire world….

 
Well, it’s official.  I have a metabolism. And a good one. I believe Ilana‘s words were “Your metabolism is actually above average.”

And because of this, I am going to tell you what I really weigh…

After the testing, I was waiting to hear: “You have no metabolism” or “It’s just terrible and that’s why you struggle with your weight.”

The Expert and I went in this morning for our BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate) testing with my favorite foodie/nutritionist, Ilana at Optimal Nutrition for Life. Ilana is a-maz-ing. I just am a bad student. The first time I followed her plan I also felt a-maz-ing and lost 7 pounds in 2 weeks.

Well, in light of my recent weight gain and the new my Ironman fear… I have been scared straight and I am on the super bandwagon ‘o health.  I am down 1.2 pounds today.  Just in a day.  Just from sheer lack of cookies.

The Expert went first.  I was scared of the nosepiece and the mouthpiece… because I am claustrophobic.  (Turned out to be just fine, BTW.)

Well. Apparently, the Expert’s “super fast man metabolism” was ….not.  His metabolism is actually below average, which means that between the two of us, we can actually follow similar, if not identical, meal plans.

Then he told Ilana his weight.  And I stared at him. “WHAT??” I wailed.

We are only 12 pounds apart in weight. Oh, this bummed me out. Big time. (Consequently, you should have seen the perfect metabolic meal I just ate and how fast I moved on my session on the elliptical…)

So Ilana went over the results. My BMR is hovering around 1987.  Which is considered a “fast” metabolism.  Who knew.

So anyway, I thought I would be bummed to learn that my metabolism is normal… not to mention “fast.” But Ilana said something that was awesome and I think is going to do wonders.

She said, “Use this fast metabolism to your advantage. Eat well, and your fat will burn off.”

As I was on the elliptical (only a few more weeks to run!)… I was looking at my jiggle thighs and singing, BURN BABY BURN it’s a THIGH RUB INFERNO… but I was thinking, I got it this time. I got it. 

Additionally, the Expert agreed to a bet. I am spreading the word because I want you guys to hold me accountable.

So, on this day, I am going to tell you my weight.

Why?

Because:
1) Some of you send me messages saying, “But you don’t understand, because you’re not as BIG as me” or “You don’t weigh as much as me, so I can’t run like you.” You will be surprised in about six seconds.

2) I want you to know exactly the struggle and truth that I am going through, so that you can see… that YOU can do triathlon (at your current weight), try to lose weight and be happy doing it (at least that’s my goal!)

3) I need your help to get me to my goal. I really do!

If I eat well and reach my Augusta 70.3 goal weight, then I get a tri bike for my race.

Not a “new” tri bike, but a tri bike nonetheless. I really, really want the bike. And I want to feel good.  I want to feel good in my skin, in my race.

So here are my numbers.  Don’t laugh.  Don’t cry.  Just absorb them. 🙂

My GOAL Weight for Ironman Augusta 70.3
September 30, 2012:
180 Pounds
My Current Weight
218.8
What I Weighed After I Gave Birth
to my Second Child
265
What I Weighed When I Started Triathlon
239
 
What I Weighed at my
First Olympic Distance Race
215
What I Weighed when I Crossed the
Finish Line at Ironman Miami 70.3
204

So, as you can see, I have not been under 200 pounds since I started this journey. Actually, I have not been under 200 pounds since 2009.  And that was only for a day, when I reached 199 for my 30th birthday.

I was on a good trajectory after Miami, but I’ve put on weight again. I am not settling for this battle.  I know it’s not about the SCALE, and I still don’t cling to my scale, and I won’t. I am going to keep my scale hidden most of the time, and only weigh at Ilana’s.

So who’s with me?? Really? Who is going to change? Let’s do it for ourselves. 

I love you guys. I mean it. The Swim Bike Mom community is amazing and I would have never imagined I would have so many thousands of amazing people who feel just like, and who are, friends.

You have given me endless inspiration and hope. I want to do the same for you.

By putting my weight out there, I am showing you what I want to be… BUT…I am also showing you what I accomplished during my “fatness.”

So. Don’t let weight stop YOU either.

We can ALL be better.  But let’s all be honest with each other, ourselves and get moving to being exactly who we dream to be.

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29 Responses

  1. Mer – you are priceless. I'll share – At my heaviest RECORDED weight, 5/14/09 I weighed 292 .. I participated in my first 5K at 260, my first Sprint Tri at around 240, and have seen 199 ONCE in the last 6 months … today, is 209.2 … down from 217 about 10 days ago. I ate horribly for the last month – but as you say, we can all change, FOR US.

    GOOD FOR YOU!

  2. I've always thought you were amazing, and you know that because I tell you that all the time. But YOU. ARE. AMAZING!!! Do you have any idea what you just did for a whole lot of triathletes (Yes, we ARE triathletes) and for those dabbling with the idea?

    I'm with you! You hold me accountable, I'll do the same for you. My highest weight EVER 177.8, which was 10 days ago. My highest baby weight (with all 3)…170. The weight I always returned to…140. My weight today is around 173 (based on 2 days ago). My goal weight…145.

    Now, I don't want one person to say to themselves…oh, ONLY 30 pounds, or 177 is no big deal. Yes it is! It's all a struggle. The struggle isn't in the weight, the struggle is in the addiction to crappy food. It's the very, very bad habits that need to be broken. These habits have been serving some purpose, just like any addiction, and need to be broken. So, no matter what the weight, the struggle is about the relationship with food. I'm breaking up with fast food.

    Hey, perhaps I'll just write my own blog post..haha!

    You're awesome Meredith. I'm excited for you because I hear the resolve in your "voice." It's there! Yay!!

  3. Thank you for sharing – I know it's hard! At my heaviest, I weighed 244 pounds. When I started running, I was between 200 and 215. I've been at goal (140 pounds) for two years now – and this year I'm doing Ironman Racine 70.3, and I'm SO PROUD of myself.

    You can do this. It won't be easy, but you CAN DO IT.

    I know I'll be cheering for you. 🙂

  4. Mad props for sharing your weight with us.

    Right now, I'm the heaviest I've ever been – and I don't have kids – and I'm at 169. With my frame, I should be ~30-40 pounds lighter.

    We just went out and stayed at a fancy hotel and ate and drank our way through the evening and morning. Now, I'm packing my bag to go to the gym to start the swim training for my July 1st tri.

    I'd love to hear what she has for a diet plan for you. I'm having a hard time finding a place to start when things are so nuts.

    Anyway, you are a rockstar and I'll help you avoid those poopsicles if you help me do the same! 🙂

  5. You are amazing, girl! You know I think I saw you for the first time at the gym in the pool. You were testing out H2o headphones or some such thing. It never registered with me that you might be trying to lose weight (or that you even needed to…). I only remember thinking 'who is this cool girl that gets people to send her things like that to try?' True story.

    I know this blog is about your struggles with your weight and triathlon but I think you would be surprised that not everyone sees you in the same way you see yourself. To me, you are Bad A@@ Meredith who is the blog marketing superstah 🙂 I admire you for going out there and making things happen.

    I had my BMR done some time ago at LFT and the numbers nerd in me LOVED that information too! It was like the key I was missing in the nutritional puzzle. I love that you have a great metabolism – USE IT to your advantage 🙂

  6. You can SO do it – and race fast along the way. Keep working hard on training and nutrition. We're all behind you.

    (My boyfriend weighs less than me. So it goes.)

  7. If posting your weight numbers helps keep you motivated that's great, but the number on the scale is pretty irrelevant. or I should say, it's only relevant to you, you know? I can run a 5K at 200lb, but I prefer to do it at 175 and less. I also like wearing non-plus size clothes and sleeping easier. But that's just me.

    The simple fact is, those who weigh more usually have pretty fast metabolisms, it's the Less you weigh that your metabolism goes down and you have to be extremely careful about what you eat – quality exercise can allow you to eat a little more, but the quality of my food dictates my body mass 8 times more than any exercise I do. Just like the quality of my exercise, and the type of exercise I do (HIIT > straight cardio, etc.) also matters.

    You're going to kick ass no matter what weight you get it done at!

  8. Weight I swore I would never be–170.
    Weight I hit and found unbearable—the big ugly 191!!
    Weight at 9 months pregos….167
    What I should weigh for normal BMI 150
    I found CRossfit, I started focusing more on my physical gains, weightlifting oly style, and thanking my body for getting stronger. Cut grains from my diet and followed Paleo eating habits.(I don't like the word diet)Three months into Paleo people were looking at me really different….I still felt fat and puffy,size 14 and it took seeing myself in several pics to realize the change my body made.My secrets, of course work my butt off, we all do that right? No grains, sugar—popsicles, well 90 % of the time. I worked with an Endocrinologist to find my bodies range for happy throid…1-1.5.Addressed metabolic syndrome of slightly but not out of range Blood sugar. So in a little over two years, focusing on my greatness, not my gut roll. My oly lifting numbers not the numbers on the scale, and magically beyond my wildest dreams ever- my butt slides easily into a size 6. I still think they just sewed in the wrong tag every time it happens.Now today,,, with my "Wilson" and impending surgery for a broken 1st metatarsal, don't even think of running for at least 3 months, I sit at a blessed 152 pounds setting my new goals for the fall. Find joy in the journey! Kim with "Wilson"

  9. Aghhhhh weight is just a number, I've been 280 and I've been 190. At 200 I looked more out of shape than I do at my current 218….(give our take a pound LOL) but I'm pretty sure that I'm in better shape than most guys at my age and I can run, bike, swim with the best of them.

  10. So I never comment on blogs- just secretly read them at work all day =) But I wanted to tell you what an inspiration you have been. I am not a small girl, 180lbs, and doing my first sprint tri tomorrow. So I logged on to read your race reports and this post really made me feel great. Thanks for showing girls like me that you don't have to be a twig to call yourself a triathlete. I love your blog- will totally buy the book- and am so glad I found this site during training. Good luck on the challenge- you are going to do awesome!

  11. That is great news! It means that your goals may be hard but they are not impossible. I am terrified of that type of testing, along with V02 max and all the others. I am afraid they will tell me I am truly hopeless. As long as I don't know, I just need to work harder and that is something within my control. If it is beyond my control, then it becomes the end of the story.

    You will be fantastic, no matter what size you are when you toe the starting line at your first 140.6!!

  12. Once again you have a great post. You continue to give me hope and inspiration. Although I am ashamed/afraid to post my weight, believe me when I say, you are making a believer out of me that all things are possible if I can just "keep moving"! Thank you!

  13. Thanks for sharing your weight…that takes courage. When I completed my first triathlon, I was bout 350 lbs. my highest weight was 390. I'm in my 4th Tri season and currently 323 lvs. I was below 300 for a week last year and I want to get back there before my Olympic distance Tri in October. We CAN do this!

  14. My heaviest recorded was 236, in fertility treatment. I don't know what the heaviest actual was, because I stopped caring about myself.

    At my peak cardio fitness at the end of February, I was still hovering over 200. At my peak muscular fitness twelve years ago, I was 140 and thought I was fat because of that number. I wore a size four at the time. The brain is an amazing organ, right? LOL

  15. Thanks for sharing! You are inspiring! When I signed up for my first tri this summer, there was a box to mark if you were an "Athena" for ladies (I think over 170 lbs) or a "Clydesdale" for men. I marked Athena but I felt bad about it. I don't feel bad anymore!!!!!!!!

  16. Thank you all for your awesome, kind, and inspiring words.

    @Liza – I am 5'7" and a little.

  17. Great post, as always! I felt the same way when I want for my metabolic rate test…I wasn't losing weight, so I thought that surely it's my metabolism! I was surprised to find that I also had fast metabolism. Once I worked with the nutritionist, I realized that I had been eating far worse than I thought. Well, I knew deep down that I wasn't eating well, I just didn't want to admit it to myself! You can do this!!!!

  18. Amazing honesty! I swear I still don't have a metabolism! After crossing the line at IMFL in 2010, I was probably slightly less than the 200 lbs I was when I started, but I was a 200 lb, Ironman (woman, Mom, etc.) it can be done, but it would have been better for me if I was a LOT less. Since then, I have gone downhill, and the scale has gone up. We seem very similar, with hubby weights and everything.
    CUrrently-220, highest, 239 Glad I found you- I love your blog and products!! I can give you some scoop on IMFL and PCB if you want!- Malissa

  19. 1987! You are lucky! Mine is a whopping 1660. Those 300 make a difference, let me tell you. Keep on being awesome, Mere!

  20. SBM – I was right there with you a couple years ago. My 1st weigh in with WW, when child #3 was a baby – 230lbs. I’d weighed 200-something for most of the previous decade (I’d convinced myself that was the weight my body simply wanted to be). It took me over a year – but I lost 75lbs and found a new me.

    You can do it! Take it one day at a time…
    I found it best to break it up into small achievable goals since the big picture looked too impossible to even imagine. So instead, I’d make a goal like – lose 5lbs by the end of June. Hitting those small goals made me feel better – and then once I hit that goal, I’d set a new one. All the way down to my goal weight. Even now that I’m at goal weight, I still set goals for myself – like tracking everything I eat for 3 days/week or something like that to help me still stay on target.

  21. Meredith, I have to tell you that this post really inspired me today. I have had some stuff happen that had me off the training wagon and up by ten pounds. I feel like a loser. Part of me wants to quit and say screw it all.

    Then I read “Don’t let weight stop YOU either” and thought hell, screw that 10 pounds, that is NO excuse…

    Thanks for the inspiration lady, I love your blog!!

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