Living in the past and driving yourself crazy with regrets and “what ifs” is a tough way to live.  No one wants to be stuck in the past, really. I think many of us are stuck in the past–reliving our “glory days” or the lost loves of our lives, or whatnot.  Those are the kinds of “pasts” that we have to get away from. That’s the kind of shiznit that will make you nuts.

Luckily, my weightlifting “glory days” weren’t that great and neither were my relationships with boys, so I don’t live in the past that much.  🙂

Mere_Weight1a-1

 Oh lawdy.^^^

Living in the moment and being present, right where I am, is something that I am working on… constantly.  Not always rushing around to get better, do more, be more–but being grateful in my time and space and home.  Every day is a little better when I focus on this. So living in the present is a good thing…

Sometimes, however, looking back to the past is beneficial.

Today, I got my buns back in the pool for the first time since this last round of sickness.

I was swimming and swimming, and I was feeling okay. But I couldn’t help but think, Wow, you’ve lost a lot of swimming fitness over the past few weeks.

3800 meters...Down 6.6 pounds, Day 4 #boost @ilanakatz #imcda #justkeepmovingforward

So I was comparing my swimming to my past, faster days of swimming—which wasn’t good.

But then… I reached further back in my memory… in the way, way past. To about four years ago, when I put on a swim cap for the first time.

27 degrees outside. Let's swim!!

And then I thought about that swimming past.  When I made it down on length of the pool, sputtering and coughing, and clinging to the wall and praying that I wouldn’t drown.  Or my first open water swim.

Now that is a past worth remembering… because it reminded me of how far I have come.  Once I remembered, it was as if my mind gave me a thirty-second slide show of recent accomplishments…  sprint, Olympic, lake swim, river swim, half Iron, ocean swim, half Iron, cold water, Ironman, and 140.6…

slide (37)

Looking at the start of my swimming journey and zipping to the present gave me a wonderful perspective this morning.

I have so much further that I’d like to go… but it’s been a heck of a ride, filled with growth and accomplishments.

And I suspect, that if you do a quick slide show in your mind, you might just see something similar.   🙂

Happy Friday, friends.

7 Responses

  1. I had one of those moments this past week. When I felt like my swim kind of sucked, but then I realized that I had just kicked 300 (including rest!) faster than I *freestyled* the 300 pool swim in my first tri 16 months ago.

  2. Great post! I will probably feel the same way when I get in the pool in January after not swimming since, I think, September. I know it won’t feel as good or be as good as last summer but last January, I could barely swim 25 yds. I thought I was going to die with the same reaction as you, sputtering and gasping for air, and there was no way I’d be able to do a sprint tri in five months. I’ve come a long way in (three weeks shy) the three years where I decided to take my life back. I still have 15-20ish lbs I’d like to lose but I’ve kept the 20 off I lost initially. I’m strong . There is a six-pack under my belly fat and defined arm and shoulder muscles under that fat. I just know they are there because I can do strength and core exercises for minutes that I couldn’t do one rep three years ago. Getting my eating under control is the hardest but I hope to enlist the help of a nutritionist soon.
    In less than two weeks, I’ll know if work will sponsor me in racing a half iron. I am going to crap my pants if they choose me and wonder WTF I was thinking… and then get down to business training!

  3. I needed this post this morning – as I sit here crapping on myself for not getting my workouts in (while chained to my desk to crank out the last of my dissertation). Much appreciated reminder to step back and regain perspective now and then – thank you 🙂

  4. This is SO important! Great post, exactly what I needed to read right now. I’m a marathoner who hasn’t run a marathon since April, but am training for my first triathlon. I get so stuck and frustrated even with myself because I could train so effortlessly before, and now – being a bit out of practice with long distance running and a newbie to cycling and swimming – it’s easy to forget where I started! I have to focus on the marathons I have finished, the distances I have completed, and remember how far I have come. This is just a little adjustment period, I know I’ll hit my stride again. But your post was exactly what I needed to read, exactly what I need to remember! <3 Beautifully said!

  5. When you are as old as I am you have a tendency to re-live those “glory days” more often than you would think….but that doesn’t mean I am not planning my super-awesome 2015 season! Like you say…I keep moving forward!

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