Coach Monster always reminds me:  keep moving forward, before bad habits have a chance to root and gain momentum.

Well. My bad habits are beyond rooting.

[Case in point:  wine habit….coupled with Instagram habit.]

Rooting isn’t at issue.  My bad habits have already turned into a flowering, couch potato plant. The pre-race taper, coupled with the post-race recovery, has left me a ridiculously lazy, sluggish and fat, flowering potato.

[Case in point:  actual picture of me, a half-Iron potato.]

My training this week was somewhat non-existent.  I thought I’d been seriously motivated to get back on the wagon after Miami, but it hasn’t really panned out.


I struggle alot with regret.  Obviously. I feel guilty for things I did ten years ago, I feel guilty for the cake pop I just mindlessly shoved down my gullet.  Regret is my biggest demon.  Well, besides my overwhelming peanut butter addiction.  


This song, Shake It Out, by my fave Florence + the Machine is dead on. I especially love the line:  
You can’t dance with a devil on your back, so shake him off.


No matter what the devil may be, one thing is certain: we can’t be good to ourselves and hit our true potential with the booger on our backs.  


This week, my goal is to shake Regret Devil and his evil twin, Lazy Devil, off my back.  I am going to forgive myself for things of the past, move my sights on to the future, to better things… and eventually stop eating garbage. 


While I’m at it, I’ll go ahead and shake off the Garbage Food Devil too.

The Expert and I had a serious family day with the kidlets today.  Honestly, it seems like forever since we’ve done that.  With all the 70.3 training for the past few months, it’s been awhile since we’ve done the whole breakfast to bedtime family intensive. The day is still going too.

I forgot how tiring family intensive weekends are. I prefer 50 miles on the bike to 2 hours at the kiddo museum.  The bike is far less exhausting.  (Another thing that makes me feel guilty).

Still, the day has been nice.  And bonus? I acquired yet another ridiculous SBM picture to boot.

Today was a scheduled recovery swim.  And I chose instead to be examined by the doctor.  Ah-hem.  No swim for me. 

Thank you all again for sharing in my journey.  
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“Shake It Out”
Florence + the Machine

Regrets collect like old friends
Here to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way, I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play
And every demon wants his pound of flesh
But I like to keep some things to myself
I like to keep my issues strong
It’s always darkest before the dawn
And I’ve been a fool and I’ve been blind
I can never leave the past behind
I can see no way, I can see no way
I’m always dragging that horse around
And our love is pastured such a mournful sound
Tonight I’m gonna bury that horse in the ground
So I like to keep my issues strong
But it’s always darkest before the dawn
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out….
And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
I am done with my graceless heart
So tonight I’m gonna cut it out and then restart
Cause I like to keep my issues strong
It’s always darkest before the dawn
And given half the chance would I take any of it back
It’s a final mess but it’s left me so empty
It’s always darkest before the dawn
And I’m damned if I do and I’m damned if I don’t
So here’s to drinks in the dark at the end of my road
And I’m ready to suffer and I’m ready to hope
It’s a shot in the dark and right at my throat
Cause looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Well what the hell I’m gonna let it happen to me
And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off 

One Response

  1. Just found your blog from Another mother runners feature. It is my new favorite!! You are truly an inspiration. I too have mommy guilt that some days a twelve hour shift in the ICU is easier than a day home with my two and six year olds.

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